At 26, Bryan Reeves was a Captain in the world’s most powerful Air Force with money, acclaim, and plenty of women who were interested in being his partner… yet he was miserable, and – his words- he sucked at intimacy.
After losing everything, traveling the world, building a multi-million dollar business, and losing everything again, Bryan started doing some deep internal work on why he never quite felt like “enough” and how his behavior and patterns were impacting his chosen romantic partners.
Today, after having triumphed through multiple dark nights of the soul, Bryan helps men, women, and couples create thriving lives and intimate relationships. His blog about men and relationships has gone viral multiple times over, and his work has helped thousands upon thousands of people create and call in healthy, fulfilling relationships…
…which is why I wanted to talk to him this Valentine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day is a, shall we say, “complicated” holiday for me. Without getting too in the weeds of my personal experience, I’ll just say that this is my first Valentine’s Day single in over a decade and it’s forcing me to unpack a LOT of deeply rooted beliefs I didn’t want to acknowledge I had around being in a relationship and self worth.
As women, we’re often given the message that we need to make ourselves attractive so we can be worthy enough to be “chosen”. That we’re supposed to stay small and convenient so as not to rock the boat. That we are the keepers of harmony in the home, and that emotions- especially “negative” emotions like sadness, stress, or grief – upset that harmony.
In this episode, Bryan and I dive deep into gender roles, how men and women experience overwhelmingly similar patterns when it comes to their relationships (of course there’s room for nuance but most people, when it comes down to it, have really similar roadblocks), and how we can start to break those patterns and start inviting healthier, more fulfilling relationships into our lives.
This is deep work, Magic Makers. I’m stupidly proud of you for wanting to wade into the deep end with me. Come on in, the water’s fine.